A Rhyme for London’s Restaurants
More than 60 icons of London’s restaurant and food world have come together to pay homage and share their love for the city’s restaurant scene with a poetic ode to the industry, a little love letter – A Rhyme for London’s Restaurants.
Written by Lucy Golding, an Account Director at Gerber Communications, the rhyme is a poignant celebration of the eclectic and diverse dining scene in the capital, and a reminder of all that diners can look forward to when normal life resumes – plus offers a glimpse into the homes and gardens of some of London’s foodie elite.
Please watch the video on our IGTV, share, and donate as much as you can afford, to one of our two charity partners (link to Virgin Giving page below). These are, the London Evening Standard’s Food for London Now campaign, which is raising funds to distribute food for vulnerable, elderly and poor Londoners, in partnership with The Felix Project; and Hospitality Action’s COVID-19 emergency relief grant, supporting hospitality workers in immediate crisis. Money raised through this campaign will be split equally between both charities.
The written version of the rhyme, in its entirety, is also below. See if you can guess all restaurants referred to throughout (Clue: there are 50 !)
@gerbercomms #RhymeForRestaurants
A Rhyme for London’s Restaurants
By Lucy Golding
It fell quiet in town,
when our restaurants shut down
and we pined for a time so familiar
Whilst the boarded-up windows,
and strange word ‘furlough’
made it all feel a little Black Mirror
And as dining destinations,
entered spring hibernation
a void filled our boroughs and diaries
As we mourned our favourite mate-spots,
our date-spots and cake-spots
our space for debaucherous soirees
Weren’t our options outrageous?
Before things got contagious
to afford such plethora and vision
In this time of uncertainty
it’s only now occurred, you see,
that restaurants are their very own religion…
This spectacle stems
from the vibrant West End,
where venues couldn’t pack in much closer
Come here for Persian,
or Taiwanese immersion
try Ramen, Robata or Dosa
Indulge in New York soul food,
or Hawaiian poke bowl food
perhaps you’re feelin’ vegan or sashimi
Fill up on Fattoush,
labneh, Baba Ganoush
if your mood is skewed towards some Israeli
For chops and chips colossal,
find that former ground floor brothel
devour a tower-high with juicy meat,
Whilst eel sandwiches with pickle,
bring a little British tickle
to that hub that’s dubbed the ‘Dame of Dean Street’
Step back to 1970,
at Soho’s home of revelry
quaff a cheeky glass of Cote du Rhone,
Where the movers and shakers,
lap up livers with capers
just don’t let the Maître D see your phone
For grub that’s Sub-Saharan,
not far from Covent Garden
one scholar’s getting spicy with plantain
Near the farm-to-fork queen,
making change on the scene,
with her single-use plastic campaign
Scoff a mini toasted sarnie.
at the pre-theatre darling
named after that historical whore
But if you’re feeling flush,
indulge your shortcrust lust
where that guy makes pie with lobster thermidor
A moneyed Mayfair Asian,
suits any opulent occasion
get frisky with its plate of fruits de mere
Or splash out on wagyu,
in the jungles of Peru,
found just a few doors down on Berkeley Square
For gluttony less glittery,
but seafood steeped in history
a Jermyn Street retreat will have your fill,
Or grace that grand canteen,
and glean its mean Eggs Florentine
a favourite of the late, great AA Gill
A smorgasbord of talent,
is flown in from round the planet
at a gourmet roundabout in Marylebone
Savour flavour from Busan,
Kyoto and Milan
Tel Aviv, Los Angeles and Rome
And if you adore,
salmon tikka tandoor
book your space on an Indian spice trail
Then make towards Baker Street,
where that bloke from the Lakes
cooks five different types of kale
From those brothers slightly posh
sample Spanish in Kings Cross,
come here for tortilla and croquetas
Sent with love from Bombay,
an Irani-style café
makes breakfast naans that don’t get much better
Seek a sensual Turkish riot
and factor flatbreads in your diet,
at that shrine to open-fire and metal tunes
But for pure dairy fandom,
get your ass up to Camden,
dip mozzarella sticks in cheese fondue
Embark east to the land
of the tattooed bearded man,
if your taste buds remain unfulfilled
And gorge on pork ribs,
made from pedigree pigs
oak smoked, brushed in sauce and chargrilled
An Italian fantasia,
serves bowls of misbehaviour
and a life-changing pesto burrata,
But for turbot to share,
there’s that place up the stairs
yet don’t the cod roe for starter
Take a short Provence vacation,
just behind the petrol station
and scoff a trough of soothing bouillabaisse
Whilst the lady from The States,
who made the royal wedding cake,
whips up her world-class bakes in Wilton Way
A veg-centric Middle Eastern,
is where you should be feastin’
for the greatest grilled halloumi you will taste
Or for planet-saving grazing,
there’s the chef who’s just amazing
doing everything he can for zero-waste
For pasta hand-crafted,
its straight to Borough Market
at that place with the permanent queue
Devour chili Tagliarini
and ‘Njuda fettucini,
pappardelle with a slow beef ragu
Further down on the left,
there’s that chef from 50 Best,
making London’s best prawn dish bar none
But for livelier dos,
blast out some Voulez Vous,
at karaoke with a side of steamed buns
And for piri piri chicken,
flying out an open kitchen
eat your way through the sunny Algarve,
Or that hot new hotel,
with the octopus roll
and staggering scenes of the Shard
Take a pew in perfect view
of the vendors in bloom,
for a plate of Singaporean fried rice
But if caffeine’s that you’re feeling,
those guys from New Zealand,
make the best flat white of your life
Watch the hoards leaving Harrods
on a terrace out of Venice
eat Caprase with Campari and gin
Which is rather convenient,
to that molecular genius
making parfait moulded like a mandarin
And down towards Clapham,
there’s still plenty happenin’,
locate the chicken livers of dreams
Or that place on the square,
with its tart tatin to share,
consume with prune and Armagnac ice-cream
A market nearby,
will give you plenty to try
from Brazilian to BYO Thai
Fill your face with Filipino,
quesadilla with jalapeno,
or those patties where the beef don’t lie
Yet when we revere,
our restaurant pioneers
We must think beyond bricks-and-mortar
There’s a multitude of teams,
who build dreams behind the scenes,
a contingent you may not have thought of
These brasseries and bars,
have suppliers and PRs
they too are being asked to hold tight
Or that chef who makes tortillas,
waiting almost three full years,
on the brink of his very first site
No less the press and media,
who feed this foodie theatre
the Insta-clan who bring the bums on seats
And even our dear critics,
who as soon as the shit hit
paid homage to the cause with poignant Tweets
Let’s honour loyal guests,
the ‘hot new chef’ obsessed
those dealing with a dining out addiction
Yes, there must be nearing thousands,
who despite being housebound
are allergic to their very own kitchens
Hats off to those triers,
who dig out their deep fat fryers,
dust off their Berry, Oliver or Stein
Yet even bake-off dreams,
run out of steam in quarantine
plus no one can make their own wine
So vineyards, farms and breweries,
dispatch throughout communities,
dining rooms turn delis overnight
Some dabble with delivery,
or honour frontline chivalry,
to fuel the NHS throughout its fight
So as we crave that cosy chatter,
glasses clinking, kitchen clatter
every morsel of this ritual we yearn
It’s now we can appreciate,
where we’ve got to celebrate,
the day that it all returns
And it will, one way or other,
these cracks will recover
the industry will mend and unite
And when it does, let’s ensure,
that we’ll never once more,
cancel plans on a Saturday night
